So I was about to type up this week’s blog post, I realized that last week’s apparently saved as a draft instead of posting. I must have clicked the wrong button. I’m really sorry it’s so late!
To me, motherhood has always seemed like a foreign concept. It’s not that I dislike children, just that I know I am not equipped with the patience and maternal instincts to care for one, nor will I ever be equipped with such abilities. Moreover, I cannot ethically bring a child into this overpopulated world when there are plenty of kids in need of homes and families. I also have a phobia of pregnancy. (There’s something literally growing inside of you, something about that makes my skin crawl. I’m not scared of pregnant people, but I’d never want to be pregnant.) I’ve never had the desire to have or raise children, and I doubt I ever will.
However, some people do. Some men choose to be fathers, some women choose to be mothers, and some people choose to be parents. Some of those parents choose attachment parenting as the way they raise those children. I don’t see anything wrong with that choice. Frankly, as long as you’re not abusing your children or instilling them with ignorant ideologies, it’s not really my place to judge.
On the whole, attachment parenting sounds rather healthy. It’s basically all about letting your children know they are loved and appreciated, and that their emotions and ideas are both valid and valued.
However, the New York Times cover, about Dr. Sear and the new attachment parenting craze, is a little strange. I fully support breast feeding, even in public, but three years old might be a bit too old to breast feed. That’s just my opinion though, and I’ll admit that it’s largely influenced by societal norms.
The only real issue I have with attachment parenting is that it takes up a lot more time, which would make it hard for two parents to work full time. (Not to mention, a single parent, or a parent that works multiple jobs, would probably not have time for this style of parenting.) Thus, someone at some point would probably have to sacrifice some aspect of their career.
Most likely, in a straight couple, that would be the mother, as attachment parenting also advocates breast feeding. So in some sense, it is slightly detrimental. I fully support stay at home moms and stay at home dads. However, some women may feel pressured into staying home with children, when they would really prefer to focus on their career. Especially when you factor in the inherently anti-feminist headline “Are You Mom Enough?”
Simply put, society teaches men that the best thing they can do is start a business, and teaches women that the best thing they can do is raise a child. Unfortunately, it seems that Dr. Sear’s version of attachment parenting might serve to reinforce that lesson.